lazy

my storm almost over... last night, when home about 7pm, Tan asked me to stay at office and she wanted to go home.... What???? this afternoon, become operator for GMs presentation...... and good news is, on saturday I can join my fair#2 little bit earlier, cos no meeting on that day!! Yihaaaaaaa I saw on Tan's computer, a document titled CV... is she going to :GO: ???? well, i am calming a bit now.... dont want to talk about it anymore just jia you!!!

The storm hasnt passed yet

Last saturday I went to Kompas Job fair :P well I should pay and found some jobs that I interested to. need to start apply asap. As I finished the work at around 2 pm, baka!!! overtime already and get no pay!! Tan even dont allow me to go. just started to teached me how to calculate those reports at around 12pm and expect me to finish it asap. What a ridiculous habit? I am not a perfect woman, just ordinary people that need to study things before become expert. Then I just promise her that I will finish on Monday. I did finished but it wasnt perfect at all. She just grumbling and 'soft torturing' while checking my reports. is there any people can do the reports perfectly 100% as she want at the first try? I dont think so. Even the datas are not tallied each other, so how can the numbers be the same, even produced in different way? Today is record, i leaved office at 10.30pm alone, no other team mates. If i have other team mates, then it was much better. but I am alone!!! ALONE!!!! Btw, in the process of checking the reports, Tan unexpectedly revealed the word 'keluar' while i didnt hear it clearly. and i did saw her computer on my recent document, there is a file title CV. Is she ready to leave? or just about to start to create the cv? Oh no, I must go first or the company must have 5 days working days if they want to keep me..... kegeeran deh well, enough for today and i started to control my emotion and not showing it directly. I can even smile and laugh to others but not to Tan, that unfair supervisor and her bule boss, that I still keep my 'sakit hati' in my heart. Anyway, the end of today's story.... Next.. watching amazing race 21 :P

badai pasti berlalu

when i wrote down this sentence, it really calmed me down. yesterday whrn to work a bit early cos there is not much traffic. Tan again came late. she teached me how to prepare budget presentation format and data, about 1pm, she didnt even allow me to go home. i was so panic cos i need to prepare myself to kompas fair. at around 2pm i think, i walked to the fair....got my free nu milk tea and then go to registration desks, filled in the data then to payment booth, paid 25k for the ticket and then i went in and walk around. finished at about 3pm, when home. and really really tired, bit galau and just go nowhere. the title really useful, till the time i typed tis, i.am already calm and ready to facing tomorrow..... 加油啊， 陳小姐。。。。

Tiring head

Last night I try to cry but still cant cry. Dont know why. anyway, i went to office a bit early today and prepare for the next battle. As Bule ask collection data for specific complex, Tan said that she will accompany me to meet him. Well, the bule just want to see her, and both keep looking each other while talking. Tan intended to push me to talk to bule, but bule just want to talk to Tan, so i just keep silent and spoke when it needed. I just angry but cant show up the anger. I just want to get out from that bloody unreasonable team asap. i just afraid that if i said it most of the time, i can fail. in lunch time, Tan spoke to me, you just need to do some politic in this team. You just go home at 5.30pm just to show to N and AM as they did superb politic just to lick their bos' ash. Tan said, she was educated with western education same with me, that just "lurus" aja but here, in this team we do need to rule the politic. i just speachless... nothing i can say anymore. This is just bullshit..... Retta said I was in my lower wheel and a bit smelly so everyone seems want to attack me. Really lost my passion to tis team anymore. Jia you jia you jia you!!!!! just forgot, today i kept my head down, half reviewed the budgets, made my head tired. Shoot!!!!!

The sign has been showned... it is the time to move on...

this morning, a super ridiculous event happened. Bule asked Tan to show him collection data from a complex and then Tan asked me to give it to Bule. bule said sit there and explain it to me, dont just throw the paper to him. Weks, I didnt really see the report yet so I just answer as far as i know. Then he got angry and said, You just cant work like this. You come here every morning and and leave without any one minute left (oh i forgot how he said this, but the point is, he is angry that I have to leave office on time because I has nothing to do...) What the hell is he talking? I am not busy and just sit there in the workstation and just waiting time to go home? Why did you hire me for the first place? u just can fire me if you want... I dont mind cos If i was wrong, it is ok, but if i am right, i will fight for it. then he called Tan, asked her if she is available for meeting with me and him at 2 pm, also the complex's manager. At 2 pm, started the meeting and then bule started to yelling and said the manager, such an idiot, bloody idiot, you are doing nothing just come to office from monday to friday and at 4 just wait time to tick to 5 and then go home. I just so surprise with the manager's behavior, he is just so calm, and didnt show any reaction that usually can happened it somebody got yelled. anyway, the meeting ended about an hour and then the manager had a little meeting with Tan. uh I didnt care at all. Actually I had really really upset with the situation. i want to cry just to release my stress but I cant cry, dont know why, may be because this is not my mistake. Even Mat, the one who sit in front of me, know that Bule's main target of anger is Tan. May be after hearing that I felt a little bit calm. in the meeting, I just shock that bule's act was like that, just like uneducated people. he just acted like 'preman', his attitude showed that he want to hit manager, but he cant do it and he just blamed it to the meeting table which is hard to broke cos it was made from marmer ( uhh dont know how to write marmer in englih) bule went out from office around 4 pm i think, then the secretary and Mat, just leave the office as soon as the time ticked to 5 pm... See.... everyone trying to make a good appearance to Bule and just go on time when he was not there. for me, Tan let me got at 5 is not Bule's business, if i had nothing to do, then what is the point spending the time longer in the office? I have other thing to spend. Everyday, Bule come to office around 9.30am and leave office around 6.30pm.... my analogy is he is spending the same working hour as we, other employees, he just have priviledge to come later, not on time and leave after general employees leave office at 5 pm. the same working hours, rite? his secretary, spending time with her bb, bule just do nothing... He only scared of COO? the one who can fire him? Thanks God that I am not really angry, but it already make me lost interest in my job. Just try hard to apply to other job and pray more that I can get other better job and better environment. I just almost unlucky with any job that I have. the first one is not satisfied with the $$, the others mostly, dissatisfied with the bosses... God, help me... Mother Mary, please pray for me.....

lost

i just lost it just now. Already typed a lot and then it missing

He can listen to what you want ....

Lately, every morning, my phone will ring, a message from mobile provider advertising something.... in that habit, i always bear a habit, hope it came from Tan, sending message, she is sick... and then this morning when i heard the ringtone, i just hope not from provider.. well, it comes true... i know i am being cruel but just give me a pleasure for a short moment. She messaged that she got home late and her body was not right, hot and cold, also nose bleeding... just a reason.. but oklah, so i can work peacefully without being disturb... hope i can get another boss, prefer male. in the after noon, bos bule looking for Tan, and i didnt give any announcement to him, the i told him that she was sick and sending message to me this morning, I just said, sorry pak, my mistake, wont do that anymore....i did it on purpose, she should told her boss that she is sick, right? I am not her kacung... Thank you JC for making my day peacefully today... At lunch's time, sharing this experience with the colleagues is fantastic!! they gave me a lot of supports and comments. thanks friends

hunting new job

uhhh actually I dislike to post things like this to blog but where can i curhat freely? My week in hunting new job already started. i have send several application via jobstreet and waiting for the calls now. Hopefully I got the fish. in 10 days's time I want to attend Oz graduate job fair... pray for me that i got hooked to the best job that dont have to work on saturdays and great supervisors and bosses, not like that uneducated jerk that sit in the cubicle next to me... 燕 玲 Jia you!!!!You can do it!!! Jesus, help me!!! and forgive my sins... Amin :)

Second post in 2012 and it will sum up all the things that happened in a year

in previous post I have stated that i have a new job. the job was admin assistant to a administrative manager... Wow, the title was so wow.. i started in nov 2, 2011, almost a year ago and i got accompanied from the person who resigned from this position for about 25 days after that I worked alone and did the searching on how to complete the job myself. The boss = Tan, at first gave a good impression but, 10 months later, i am sick of her and she is just suck..... when talked about Tan.... my head started to burn....She is just completely suck and childish like uneducated person. Just like this afternoon, she warned me not to take the full lunch time just for lunch cos i have urgent review to be done. What? you just want the easy part only, i did the checks and you just pointed it out in the meeting in quick time without spending your brain thinking hard. if it was urgent, you can just go down stair to go to ATM to get some money or just walked around.... a month ago, Tan told me to come early every morning cos it was budgeting month. just 'bingung', what for? the meeting started at 9am and i have to come early just to be your 'kacung'? no way..... the point that i come early just to set up the laptop and connected it to the projector. That is!!!! so simple only take 5 mins to set that, right? just unbelievable...... This happened because she dont like me to talk to the purchasing staff that a good friend of mine, a friend to share the working stuff. i just dont understand why she dislike me talking to the purchasing staff. 2 person before me, also treated this way to, got warning about talking to the purchasing staff. What so great from the purchasing staff till Tan got afraid or envy every time i talked to her??? Tan is sick in health and mind... hope she can 'go' smooth in curing her sickness or I just get new job.. .Come new job, come to me.. please... really need it asap....

first post in 2012

it has been almost two years since the last post......there were lots of things happened. i got job in jakarta, in one of the biggest property group in the nation. it paid well, but the boss shows her evil and childish side after a year i worked with her...time to move on and i have applied to few other company. i just dont want to rewrite again...but i need to plug in tis blog so it can be read in the future.

helppp

helpppp
i need a nice job...
preferable in sydney
anyone has the offer? please let me know

last few post before 2011

It has been along time since the last post. Well,I know it, but I was too lazy to type and post. I am kind of addicted to FB games that required me to online everyday just to check the game. Well, I am officially addicted because I had nothing to do since I had lost my last job last year and I haven’t found new one since the. Pathetic, right? I know but what can I do? It seemed that I had been cursed that I cant find the job that I want and I don’t even know what kind of works that I need and will be my interest.
In few days time, I will try to type and tell what are my thinkings this year after losing job, my views and opinions about other in this city’s society.
Lately, I was annoyed by the pregnancy’s term. Why? It was because of L&S. Sorry to hide the right names. They got married legally in one month of this year and less that 40 weeks of their married, a son has ‘come’ out and it claimed the baby was 40 weeks when got delivered. In this society, from my point of view, it means that ‘doing thing(睡在一起)’ before married. The couple has been so proud with the baby. Well, of course, in Chinese tradition, first son or first grandson is a honor, as the continuing of the family. If this condition happened to family in ‘bule’ country, it ok. No problem but If this happened in my family, I cant imagine what will the world become. Hahaha.
The thing disturbing is how to count week of pregnancy? Once, my sister in law told me, that if the first pregnancy, the baby will be less that 9 months in mother’s womb cos the mum still ‘young’, can’t count the period, but in the case I have given above, the mum said, the baby is 40 weeks n 1 day and she got difficulty in delivered. I have heard lots of story about delivery and I know there are lots of videos in youtube about the delivery but I have no dare to watch it, but I have the eagery to know about it. This the thing that I never thought before. I know the delivery process would be easy or difficult, it depends on the mum and her condition at that time. And it is true that the process will involve ‘life or death’ of a mum. So Mum is soo soo soo 伟大. Before hearing L&S story, I have read N&G’s blog about their delivering process. May be because of different country, the rules also different and I think that other that this country, the process will be ok. (--- apa maksudnya coba???)
Waks, the story about ‘pregnancy’ is done. Huh, I cant write it longer, Why why why??? 我会好好加油!!!
Married life
As a custom in Chinese family, a girl must be married, or you can say that it is a fixed rule that a woman must be married. If not, it will be negative view from the elders. I just cant understand it, that some of the people still believe this view, especially people that has educated ( I mean here is the people who has bachelor or master degree, and old/eldery). Well, Married is never across in my mine, till now. Lots of thing has to be done to reach the married life. It just not u and me, but the whole 2 family( as said in the dramas). This is true. Combination of 2 different people that spend the rest of their life together and never be separated unless death. For some people, married is easy and simple, they do it just perfectly the role but some are difficult.
For example, my aunty got ‘unwealthy’ husband and had to spend about 20+ year of her to be with him and prepare every thing for him. But what had she got? I think, nothing, nil. Yang ada, tiap tahun banjir, beresin, hidup pas2an, berantem terus, no good communication. Yang suami selalu mendengerkan suara2 dari abang ato sodara2 kandungnya tanpa memikirkan apa keinginan istri atau berkomunikasi dengan baik dan tanpa rahasia. My mum even said, my aunty has 苦命 till end of her life. At least, her last ‘home’ is settled good enough for her. That is only she got at the end of her life. I am soooo missing her.
Other case, good married life, but has no children, is also a problem. In Chinese tradition (again), child is a must, if not they will consider, not lucky and just blame the woman. The parents will blame the bride for can not born the babies without thinking or considering whose fault actually. Beside that, if the first child is not a boy or the couple can not have baby boy, it also consider ‘unluck’ cos can’t continuing their family line. The wife always be blamed, so picky  I still remember my biology teacher in SMU, she taught us that the man/husband who determined they gonna have baby girl or baby boy cos man has XY chromosomes and women has YY chromosomes which will give the chromosomes equally to her child. So please….. blame the man/husband who has different chromosomes. Don’t blame the women!!!!!
Few of my friends has married outside the country. And what I can see from them is they are not having babies as soon as they get married, they has tendency to hold to have babies, I don’t know why but I think it is really good so each other can understand better what he/she. For the one who has married di negara2 lain, g liat sih ada happily ever after although without kehadiran baby cos biaya hidup di luar sana tuh gede banget. One think I envy is they are workers and they can have enough money for them to travel ke luar negeri, jalan2. While yg tinggal di indo, walahhhhh, sama2 pekerja tapi kesempatan untuk jalan2 ke luar negeri minim sekali. Perbedaan yg sangat menyolok. So envy with their life, yang bisa jalan2 ke asia timur, eropa tiap tahun while mereka masih muda. Kl di indo, yg jalan2 malah yang tua, yg udah mulai start to pension. What a different!!!
Dah married, punya anak juga masalah, sorry these all in the view of negative side of married hahaha. Gimana cara mendidik anak jg menjadi masalah ke depan. Ada yang karna anaknya ga byk, jadi dimanja banget. Jaman skrg udah ga kaya dulu lagi, punya anak banyak2. Paling byk 1-3 doang. Ada yang berhasil mendidik anaknya disiplin, terbuka and kreatif. Ada juga yang membiarkan anaknya berkembang sendiri menyesuaikan diri dengan lingkungan. Tapi kenyataan yang ada. Kebanyakan dimanja berlebihan. If compare to my childhood, my mum never care too much with my study. Kl sekarang, ortu sibuk ikut anaknya skul, bikinkan pr ato prakaryanya, jadinya anaknya manja banget. Trus ada juga yg anaknya emang ‘kali bakat’ ga suka skul, buku pelajaran ga rapi, acak2an, tapi bisa aja lulus, ada jg yg rapi banget, rajin, pinter tapi ya biasa2 aja. Yg ga tahan sih kl anaknya ce, ga rapi n cuek ama sekitar serta cuek jg ama pelajarannya. Duh pusing…….. yang enak sih, kl bisa mendidik anaknya terbuka, teratur, takut ama orang tua, disiplin tapi ga kepo haha. No one is perfect but try to be perfect is good!!
This last few years I have learn a lot about Chinese traditions. So many that never been taught in life, I have learned it from tv shows and readings. In Taiwan, so easy to determined the bride has been pregnant or not when their wedding ceremony is taking out. Kl yg married, the bridenya bakal dipayungin payung item, means dah lagi hamil. Kl yg ga hamil, dipayungin pake talam dr bahan grass. And 家出去的女儿 是波出去的水. Kejam banget neh istilah. Anak gadis yang dinikahkan diartikan air yang sudah disiram keluar, ga bisa balik lagi, so the girl has to listen to her husband’s words. And urusan di 娘家sudah tidak menjadi urusan the girl lagi. Cruel hah?
Different religion jg a problem that had to be considered, beda agama beda cara pendidikan dan pengajaran. From what I see, yg Kristen, terutama yang kuat n rajin pelayanannya, will serahkan semuanya kepada Tuhan lewat doa2nya. So pasti selalu doa. Yg KAtolik, ya rajin ke gereja, gitu doang. Different ways of life will make the different of life quality.

The last 2 jobs that I had
Not bad sih, Cuma ya terjepit di tengah and salah g juga se, kaga minta training 1 bulan dulu, dah langsung tempur begitu, trus dikerjaain lagi ama bullshit people in the team. Udah gitu, g juga kaga ada pengalaman or bayangan bagaimana kerja di hotel, tapi mendengar penjelasan dorang ‘accors’ di pusat seh, gampang lah. Begitu juga pemikiran g, lah orang laen aja bisa, g jg mesti bisa dong. nah ini malah menjadi trauma buat g, and g klaim bahwa that job made me lost few kgs of my fat wahaha, in unhealthy way. Never thought I will met sucks people in the team. Yang ternyata tidak suka dengan kehadiran g di bagian financenya. I love finance job but –not to be idealist- environment also a factor in a job situation. Agak nyesal sih, melepas kerjaan di Rabo (yg gajinya pas2an tapi g hepi). Bisa kerja dengan konsen, meskipun kadang2 stress, but it a responsibility yang g suka. It already become habit kl kerja di rabo. 真的很后悔 melepas kerjaan di sana but nasi sudah menjadi bubur and to wake up again, is not an easy way to do.
Kerjaan berikutnya sih di plantation, yah ketemu bos aneh juga. Yg kaga ada kontrak kerja, trus suruh2 masuk hutan. And kerjain g, minta g terjemahkan laporan, yg secara ga sengaja, g ketemu terjemahannya di salah satu file di computer network. Emang g penerjemah? Minta g terjemahin laporan. Kan ga bener, meskipun lu bos. And also asking for lembur till midnite. Orang laen yg kerja di jkt aje kaga lembur ampe midnite, neh di kota kecil, lembur sampe midnite? Kaga salah? Well, I sooo have no luck n destiny with this company.

Next problem is how can I ‘wake up’ ? who to cure me? I am in deep ‘sick’ and need to be cure asap!!!!! Helppppppp 我生病!了谁来医?

new post coming soon

it has been a whilee
a new blog post will be up soon

need

i need to start blogging...
need to be diligent :D
story telling is a must I think

help

.............
help.................help.............
been more than 6 months. what should I do?
need help

nan guo

wo hao nan guo
hau xiang mei you direction of life
dont know what to do and no one i can ask for about this
What can i do? Go to capital city?Ihate there because lots of pejabat teras
i wish i can go back to sydney, i think that is the place where i belong....

Please help me God!!

kaget, aneh try to gabung kembali

well, just now chat through fb with some old friends
well on the other side try to make up with one of friend who i thinked has miss understood me for long time and been greedy with money

kaget aja tuh
ternyata kalo kumpul rame jg seh but the distance separated us all apart

The hard of 2009

There are many things happened in the past few months. Last month, I lost my aunty. I never expect this to be happened so soon and sudden. She got heart attack and too late to be hospitalize as my cousin said. When people got first heart attack, he/she should consumed one kind of medicine, but my aunt didn’t. Well, you can say that this is destiny; you cannot refuse or accept it the way it was. The one thing that I really regret was she didn’t really enjoy her life; she has to work hard all through her life. Her adopted son was so disappointed; all he wants is money money and money. And his father was so unbelievable crazy. Why I say crazy? This is because he don’t have any basic, even to decided where to buried my aunty. He even has to ask his big brother, all the decided should be decided by his big brother???? Emang bener2 gila deh, co kaya gitu kaga punya pendirian, apa2 mesti org laen yg menentukan. Emang nasib nasib, apa mau dikata lagi. Then, after the burial then arised some other non sense excuses and reason to ‘throw’ away his son. Why you have to adopt a child if you don’t want to take responsible of him/her?

The next other thing was I resigned again for this latest job. The manager asked me to go to the plantation again and I refused to go then she got angry and complained that I have to work as she ordered, if not then don’t work, she even try to scary me that she will fire one of the employee. What the hell is this to do with me? You want to fire your employee, it was ur business, not mine, I don’t care at all. Then I just found out that most of the employees there dont like her. As she was employed and then reacted with her new role but don’t cooperate with other division, and even as other division to follow her instructions. Mana ada yg kaya begitu, ada juga saling menyesuaikan diri and melebur sambil kerja sama.

Now I am jobless and still cant find which way to follow. Parents are already asked me to form a family but this is hard thing to do. To find a job now is difficult, how can I form a family? It is not as easy as they think. All of my dreams are haven’t come true. I need to go back to the city that I felt happy and sad, which I spend some time there. So envy with W with the situation they have. Kapan g bisa kaya mereka? Rumah kecil sederhana ( I know that was not cheap but they enjoyed and happy) have nice life there, byk temen and kenalan.

The end of this time curhat :P

Farewell and another story of life

Another mourning day!!
This time was the third time we lost one of the family members. It was my aunty. She has claimed sick since 2 weeks ago but didn’t cure well. Probably we don’t really know what the symptoms of the heart attack are until we have clear explanation about it from my cousin. She spend 7 days in hospital and the on Monday morning, said good bye to us and the go to heaven to us our Saviors and other family members that already there before. Farewell 3 ie, we always remember you as a nice person who care and love us. Now, our worries would be concentrated to hok as his dad cant be a good example. I am so disappointed of him now.

My new job
Well, I have found the new job recently but I don’t really like it. So I try to stay as long as I can while finding other that more suitable for me.
It is a plantation company that is not really well established. As part of my job is I have to go to the plantation to get the data which I don’t really know what that is. As I went to the field, I didn’t do anything, sadly, just wasting my time there. I don’t like it. Full of people smoking and when I told the manager that there are many people smoking there, she said just asked them to stop smoking.!!! What the hell? Where are you? This country never accept request like this. I will complain about this Monday and wont go to the field next day as they planned, let see what happen.

This last semester of 2009 has been tough for me, don’t know why. Hope next year would be better

confused or trauma?

well well
i am back to for for a week
a whole new job that i dont know what i have to do
so weird or I just trauma of the past ? i dont know
I have to find out or I have to work in Jakarta? upsss
so hopeless now

God, please lead me to find the way out of this problem!!